The Moment You’ve Been Waiting For

Here is the moment you have been waiting for. You know the one. The moment reality gets so real President Bush is finally forced to confess. Yes, he did hire an incompetent political donor instead of an expert to head FEMA. Yes, he spent too much money planning for war and not enough planning for natural disaster. He’ll admit the war on terror has created more terrorists than it has killed and that Iraq ain’t going to be a democracy any time soon. Moreover, Abu Ghraib was not just a few bad apples and voluntarily starting a war does contradict centuries of Christian just war theory. True story. It’ll be so cathartic he’ll go on to admit he cares more about rich friends than poor people (but who doesn’t?), that bump on his back really was a listening device, even Harvard couldn’t properly edumicate him, and, sad to say, yes, he does look a little like a monkey.
The best part is that with each confession President Bush grows smaller and smaller until, when he finally admits that he is the embodiment of evil in the world, he’s small enough for me to reach down and grab him. Holding the monkey in my hands, I weigh my options. Should I forgive the monkey? Or should I put the monkey on trial for war crimes? I am just about to announce my decision when… I wake up.
Let’s face it. The Bush era is not over. I resent that he will never have to look me in the eye and apologize. But does my desire to see him admit failure go so far that I enjoy watching Iraq spin out of control? Or feel satisfied when his screw-ups cause additional suffering in Louisiana? Can I wish my country well and at the same time hope its president is humiliated and discredited? Our futures are bound together. If he fails, we all fail. So, instead, let the president’s new-found civil-rights language be genuine. Let his dream of democracy come true. Let his approval ratings deservedly rise. And until the day reality does get real, let this little monkey dream take the edge off my resentment.